Vedant by Kavita Shivdasani

Thursday, October 22, 2009
7th November 2005

Vedant Modi was a student of the S.P.J.Sadhana School for the Developmentally Challenged. I first met him when I joined there as an instructor in 1980 with no prior teaching experience. I was assigned a motley group of six youngsters to train in functional academics - Rama, Ayesha, Boss, Cyrus, Vasudha and of course Vedant.

Each one was functioning at a level diametrically opposed to the other. My lack of know-how was a plus point as I was oblivious to the disadvantage and hence quite unafraid of the task at hand!

Vedant appeared to be like any normal youngster except that he had slightly altered physical features. He was very clear about how any assignment must be done. If he disagreed with my point of view he’d wait till I’d finished my lecture. Then he’d look at me with his bespectacled Garfield eyes, sniff, brush his nose with an upward flick of his palm and deliver me a succinct lecture right back in his nasal twang. And that would be that!

There was one thing however, I was determined that he would have to do as I wanted done, and that was how he ate his lunch! Vedant relished food especially chicken. At lunch time he would rush to get his lunch box and wolf down his food straight from the container without bothering to sit down with the others.

After watching this for a number of days, I finally couldn’t bear it any more. He would just shovel food into his mouth as if somebody was about to grab and run off with it! This was one thing I decided he’d have to learn to do right. He just would not listen. Finally totally fed up (after warning him in advance of course) I confiscated his lunch and he had to go hungry that day.

He cried, he cried huge puddles of tears and it did seem for a while that the school was going to get swept away by the deluge. Everyone including Vedant firmly believed I was the perfect wicked witch. But this was something I wasn’t going to give in to.

In the days that followed and up to the time I continued to instruct him, for 5 or 6 years thereafter, never did he gobble his food in my presence. At lunch time he made it a point to bring to my attention that he had taken out his mat, spread it out neatly on the table, hung his bag on his chair, and served his food on the plate and that he had eaten it without gobbling.

But although he did as he was told where food was concerned he never forgave me the trespass of having deprived him of his lunch.

This lack of ‘forgive and forget’ went on throughout my 23 year association with him. Even after I left Sadhana School in 1987 his mother Swarupa and I kept in touch but in a very desultory fashion. If I met Vedant at certain functions he was always very polite but his disapproval was plain.

There was another incident that had added to his displeasure. This had occurred about the same time as my tussle with him over his food habits.

Once a week, Vedant would buy himself a chicken lunch from Joe’s canteen, for the princely sum of Rs. 5/-. (Joe by the way was the canteen manager of Sophia Polytecnic where Sadhana School is located) Apparently the price had been revised to Rs. 7/-. When Vedant arrived on his usual day for his chicken lunch he had only Rs.5/- but the menu card read Rs. 7/-. Joe tried to explain to Vedant that he would have to settle for a meal that suited his budget and that he could not possibly buy his usual chicken lunch.

Whenever Vedant did not get his way where food was concerned it was the usual tears and tantrums. He apparently threw such a gala paroxysm and cried so much that he created another huge puddle in the canteen. Joe in his fright gave him the chicken lunch for free!

Well be that as it may, Joe came rushing to see me that evening and explained what had happened, clarified the price revision and requested that I should inform Vedant’s mother of the new price. Poor Joe thought I’d punish him or some such thing for making Vedant cry!

Instead the poor man was rather staggered when I blew a fuse at him for pandering to Vedant, and giving him a free meal. Joe stammering explained that he had caved in as Vedant had almost created a Noah’s Ark like torrent that had made him feel like the wicked witch or its male equivalent.

The point here was that Joe had fortunately known Vedant and that as Vedant belonged to the school he, Joe had been soft with him. In a restaurant or any other public place Vedant would probably have been ill-treated, spoken to rudely and handled roughly. It was very necessary that Vedant learned to toe the line in certain situations and realize the importance of propriety. If Vedant was to be mainstreamed into daily life with those who are not like him (the latter being the majority) one would just have to harden one’s heart. Vedant of course had to sit through another of my terse monologues.

Would Vedant ever forgive me? One day, Swarupa had a lunch for all the Sadhana School teachers and I were invited. I could suddenly sense a conspicuous softening of his feelings towards me. It felt good.

It really felt great however, when a couple of months before he passed away there was a big lunch once again for all his school teachers at his residence. Unfortunately for me it was on a Saturday when I could not reschedule the childrens classes I conduct on week-ends. I did, however, tell him on the telephone that I’d visit him later in the evening after work.

Although I was keen to meet him, it was just not possible. So the next best thing was to call him and have a very long chat. Vedant was disappointed that I had not been able to sample all that heavenly food. I did another rather stupid thing and said that I’d come and visit him the next day and could not make it again. We had this second really long conversation on the phone.

It was evident that any annoyance or resentment or whatever it was that he had felt in those 20 years he had worked out for himself and put behind him. I had done nothing to help him reduce that feeling. He had done it all by himself.

As a youngster he had proved without doubt that he could speak out and not buckle under pressure. As a young man although the disciplining had been tough, he had eventually coped constructively.

Vedant was one of the most unique youngsters I came across in S.P.J. Sadhana School for the Developmentally Challenged because no matter who the person he was dealing with he could stand up for himself. He was always most focused in knowing what he wanted and following through on his desires.